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1c:Tca6,良いね、そんなふうに思える相手がいるって^^とりあえず私個人は、そういう感情をもてる質問者さんは幸運だと思うし、その恋を実らせてほしいなとは思う、、、！

しかし結論から言うと
これから高3になるという時期は恋愛をする時期ではない、、、かな。
片想いは問題ないとは思うけれど、両思いになって付き合うと、片方あるいは両方受験失敗しているケースが私の周りは多かったように思う。これからみんな勉強するし、成績(偏差値的な意味で)は、けっこう落ちると思う。そういった受験勉強のストレスを交際相手のせいにしたくなったり、それで関係がうまくいかないことに罪悪感をおぼえ悩んだり、連絡頻度が減ってどちらかの不安が爆発したり、負の要素ばかり大きくなって、受験勉強に費やすための時間や気力が奪われていく、、という流れが待ち受けていると思う。

でも、その恋を諦めなければならないというわけではなくて、プラスの方向に働くように、もっていくことは可能かなと思う。まず、恋をする=付き合う、というわけじゃないから、今のままの関係を維持しつつ、互いを鼓舞できる関係になったらいいんじゃないかな。勉強を教えあったり、模試の成績を競ったり。それってすごく楽しいし、勉強も頑張れると思う。

わたしの話をして恐縮だけどもw、わたしも高3のとき片想い？みたいな人がいた。塾で、出席番号の席が前後で、おでんの好きな具は何かという話で仲良くなった人がいたんだけど、成績も同じくらいだったからよく競ってて、彼は現代文が苦手だったから私が解説したり、逆に私は英語が苦手だったから彼に解説を頼んだりしてて、、、笑。せっかく教えてもらったのに成績が上がらなかったり下がったりしたら忍びないから一生懸命英語は頑張ったし、国語も、彼に教えるんだからちゃんと良い成績キープしないとなとこれまた一生懸命頑張れた。結構、彼との良好な関係がわたしを合格に導いたと言っても過言ではないくらい良い関係だった。

クリスマスに、センター近くなるしもうなかなか会えないかもということで学ランの第二ボタンをもらい、恋愛感情を認めつつ、お互い合格したタイミングで付き合えたらなと思ってたんだけど、結局彼は地方の大学へ進学することになって、受験期以来会うことはなかった、、、、笑。
でも今思えば、安易に付き合って、成績が上がらない理由を彼のせいにして関係をぶち壊すより、適度な距離を保った関係を維持して、なんというかきれいな思い出を保つことができてよかったなあとも思う。

まとめ！
・恋は諦める必要はないがまだ付き合うな
・互いにwinwinの勉強関係をつくれ

以上〜1d:Tbfc,結論、付き合わない方がいいと思う！

でも、そのまま恋愛は続けて良いと思う。

どっちだよ笑って感じだけれど、要は今の感じのままにして付き合うのは合格後の方がいいと思うってこと。

この時期付き合うとね多分、不安感情増幅するだけだと思うんだよね。いらんことで心配したり、相手にされてないと悲しくなったり、成績低迷したとき八つ当たりしてしまったり。受験中も円満にやってるカップルは回答者の周りはいなかったな。

最初はうまくやるんだけれど、徐々に崩れていく感じ。

なので、最初の、お互い力合わせて頑張ろ！くらいのそこまで干渉しない、付き合う前の時期のほうが良いモチベーションを保てると思う。

ちなみに回答者は、高３では絶対に彼氏作らないと決めていたので作らなかったけれど(いや作れなかった?w)、良い恋愛はしてた😏

ちょっとそのときのことしゃべっていいですか。笑


塾のひとで、苗字順で席が前のひとだったんだけれど。最初はお互い全く関心がなかったが、ある日何気ない会話で、お互い好きなおでんの具が昆布ということで仲良くなった。
成績も同じくらいで、模試のあとは必ず成績を見せ合う仲に。彼にバカにされないように、差が開かないように、勉強も頑張れた。
家ではお互い勉強できない派だったので毎日塾の自習室通い&閉館まで一緒に勉強した。閉館のときは、自習室が真っ暗になるので2人で肝試し?をしたり。青春をした。
しかし受験が近づくにつれ、個別授業などが増え、会う機会が減っていった。
センター後、私大入試直前、久しぶりに彼と会った。すると彼は、次はいつ会えるかわからないから、、と、学ランのボタンを私にくれた(鼻血)。私はそのボタンを筆箱の中に入れ受験に挑んだ。強くなれた気がした...
回答者は結果合格。彼は国立志望だったのでまだ受験が残っていたが、お祝いしてくれた。初めて彼の自転車で2人乗りして町を回ったりした。だいぶうかれていた。
でも実は彼はセンターがあまりうまくいっていなかったようで。第一志望ではなく、地方の国立へ行くことが決まった。
回答者も進学の準備やら進学してからもドタバタ忙しく、彼に会えたのは結局それが最後であった、、、、、
彼とは結局友達以上恋人未満だったけれど、彼と頑張れたから合格できたのかも知れない。。なんて思っている。。。涙


、、、、何が言いたかったのか忘れたけれどとりあえず
・まだ付き合うな
・付き合う前の良好な関係が良好なモチベーションとなる

いかがでしょう。
1e:Tff9,楽しそう〜〜笑
でも、その子のことを今までは知らなかったということは、告白されたことが嬉しいだけで、その子のことは別に好きじゃないんじゃないかなと思ったのだけど。どうなんだろう？？

私も似たようなポリシーを高3のときもっていて笑、結論から言うと付き合わなかったよ。

周りの人を見ても、あまりおすすめはしないかな。。なんでかというと、片思いの恋愛と両思いの恋愛って違うのはなんとなくわかるよね👀片思いのうちは何でも楽しいし嬉しいんだけど、両思いになると楽しい嬉しいが前提となってしまって一瞬でも楽しくなければ、不安になってしまうものなのよ、、とくに思春期は、、！！
加えて、受験という重圧のなかで成績が伸び悩んだりしてそのやりきれない思いを恋人にぶつけちゃったりして関係がこじれたり、あとは2人の世界に没頭して受験戦争上消息不明になり気付いたら浪人になったりしている人を何組か見た、、🤫

高校生活で楽しい恋愛は不可欠なのはそうだと思う。。けど、受験競争激しいこの国に生まれてしまって大学受験を志す以上、高校生活を楽しむべきだという主張はナンセンスなのかもしれないね。大学にいくには(内部進学や指定校推薦?を除き)絶対に受験を経なければならないし、高校時代は勉強に最も時間を割かないといけないからはっきり言って恋愛は負担が増えるだけと考えてもらったほうが現実的かなと...。あ、でも今高2なのか。高2のときは私も彼氏いたわ笑笑。高2はギリギリかなー。高3では本格的に受験勉強に染まらないといけないかな。

なので一個人のアドバイスとしては、今は受験勉強に専念したい+○○ちゃんが良ければ受験が終わってから付き合わない？みたいなことを言えばよろしい。



おまけなんだけど笑、
「吊り橋効果」ってなんとなく聞いたことあるんじゃないかなと思う🌉
グラグラ揺れるもろい話の上に男女を置き、揺れたときお互い怖いという感情とともに心臓がバクバクするけど、その心臓バクバクが相手のことが好きでバクバクしている？！と脳が間違えることで起こる効果のことね。
質問者さんの文章読んだとき、これかなーと思った笑。告白されると誰でも嬉しいし興奮するじゃん。相手のことが好きで興奮したんじゃなくて、告白されたこと自体が嬉しくて興奮したのに、脳が相手のことが好きで興奮したのだなと間違えて、いつの間にか相手のことが気になってついに好きになるという感じね。
そういうきっかけは恋愛にはよくあることだし全然間違いではないけどね。
しかし受験生で必ずしも恋愛しなくていい時期に、そういう形で恋愛を始めて万が一受験に失敗した場合、、、なんてこった！て感じはあるよね笑。
更にどうでもいいことを並べると、大学生になって、サークルに入ると、夏にみんなでどこか田舎へ合宿へ行くということがよくある。で、だいたい男女ペアで肝試しをするんだけど、肝試しの後から2人の様子がおかしくなって気づくとなんか付き合ってるじゃんーー！ていうことが、よくある。まさに吊り橋効果だね笑。ちなみに私も昔それに引っかかった1人笑。なんてこっただわ。

何が言いたいかわからなくなってしまったけれど、とりあえず
・今は恋愛いらない(まあ高2ならギリokな気もするけど高3では本当におすすめしない)
・大学生になっても恋愛はできる！

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mb-1","children":"はじめまして。\nいかにも青春といった感じでうらやましいです。\n\n受験期の恋愛には障壁が多いですが、人を好きになる気持ちを止めることはできませんよね😰この状態で好きな気持ちを抑えて勉強なんて絶対できませんよね。悶々としたまま本番に入ってしまうのは避けたいですよね。\n\n思い切って気持ちを伝えてしまうのがいいと思いますよ。\nただ、その際あなたが挙げられていた不安も伝えてあげてください。恋愛のせいで自分と相手の受験に悪い影響が出てしまうのではないか不安だと。相手があなたの想いに応えてくれるなら、きっと一緒に真剣に考えてくれます。\n彼が受験を理由に告白を断ることは明確、と言われていましたが、そうとも限らんと僕は思いますよ。僕は男ですが、受験勉強は基本的に独学だったので心細い時もありました…やはり1人で勉強だけするのはしんどい。そんな時に自分をいつも支えて、そして一緒に頑張ってくれる人がいてくれたらそれはもう嬉しいものです。しかもそれが恋する人だといったら、なんと素敵なことでしょうか。というわけで、もし自分がお相手なら快諾します。（もちろんデート等はできるだけ我慢してくださいね。まあ予備校デートとか模試デートとか素敵そうですけど）あとはあなたの想いにお相手がどれだけ応えてくれるかの問題です。気持ちを伝えるのはあなたの仕事、選ぶのは相手の仕事、振られてしまったら、潔く諦めて勉学に集中しましょう。\n案外立ち直れるものです。（しばらくは落ち込みますが）\n\n最後に…苦しくて泣きそうなほど人を好きになれるということは本当に素敵で、羨ましいと思います。そんな想いを受験のせいで相手に届けることができない…なんて悲しいというか、なんだか虚しすぎるとは思いませんか？僕個人の意見として、受験とか関係なくその想いは絶対に相手に伝えるべきだと思いますよ。これから1年間悩みは多いと思いますが、あなたに恋愛と受験、2つの春が訪れることを願っています。\n\n人の恋愛事情もよくわからない、いち大学生の身分で失礼しました。"}],["$","div",null,{"className":"flex 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items-center py-4","children":[["$","div",null,{"className":"flex-1","children":[["$","div",null,{"className":"mb-1","children":"受験生は恋愛など捨てるべきなのか"}],["$","div",null,{"className":"text-xs text-caption line-clamp-2 mb-1","children":"✅私の個人的な意見\n\n→私は恋愛は受験にはいらない派でした。受験は自分との戦いと言われていますが前提として周りの条件が支障にない程というものだと思います。恋愛＝支障と決めつけるのは良くないことだと思います。実際恋人がいながら受験に受かっている友人を私は何人も知っていますし全然ありだと思います。しかし私は恋人がいない状態ならわざわざ受験期に作る必要がないと思いますし、なにかと恋人の存在を支障と感じるタイミングがあるなら距離をとって付き合うというのでもいいと思います。\n\nあくまでゴールは受験合格です。\n\nそのために最も最適なルートを選ぶべきなのかなって思います。恋人の存在が最適かどうかに関しては人それぞれです、ほんとに。自分の性格との照らし合わせですかね。少なくともわたしは必要ない派でした笑"}],["$","div",null,{"className":"flex mb-1","children":[["$","svg",null,{"stroke":"currentColor","fill":"currentColor","strokeWidth":"0","viewBox":"0 0 24 24","className":"text-subPrimary mr-1","children":["$undefined",[["$","path","0",{"fill":"none","d":"M0 0h24v24H0V0z","children":[]}],["$","path","1",{"d":"M12 6c1.1 0 2 .9 2 2s-.9 2-2 2-2-.9-2-2 .9-2 2-2m0 10c2.7 0 5.8 1.29 6 2H6c.23-.72 3.31-2 6-2m0-12C9.79 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rounded-lg border border-text px-4","children":"不安"}]]}]]}],["$","div",null,{"className":"ml-3","children":["$","div",null,{"className":"bg-caption w-20 h-20 rounded-sm overflow-hidden","children":["$","div",null,{"className":"w-full h-full 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items-center py-4","children":[["$","div",null,{"className":"flex-1","children":[["$","div",null,{"className":"mb-1","children":"受験と恋愛の両立について"}],["$","div",null,{"className":"text-xs text-caption line-clamp-2 mb-1","children":"友達の話でよろしければ。\n\n高二の冬から付き合い始めた友人カップルは今現在も付き合っており、どちらも志望校に合格しています。\n\n夏までは頻繁に会っていたようですが、夏休み明けは二人で話しあって2人で学校外で会うのは週に一回にしようと決めたそうです。つまり2人は質問者様と同じように恋愛も勉強もがんばったわけです。\n\n\nたしかに、恋人がいると落ちる！みたいなのってよく聞きますよね。そりゃ恋人に割いてる時間を英単語暗記の時間にまわせば偏差値あがるでしょ…とは思いますが、だからといって受験生が恋愛をしてはいけないなんておかしいです。受験は結局日々の生活の延長であり、勉強だけに時間を割くのは苦しいです。ですから友人カップルのように時に励まし合い、時に諌め合うといった関係を築ければ良いですね！\n\nただ、友達（彼女のほう）いわく「勉強以外に気にしなきゃいけないことがあるのは疲れる」そうです。例えば喧嘩しただとか、彼氏の誕生日だ、とか。ここは覚悟しないといけないかもしれませんね。\n\n\nかくいう私は勉強に全振りしていましたが…\n今思えば恋愛もしつつ受験したかったなー笑\n\nせっかくお付き合いすると決まったんですから、まずは楽しんでください！！笑\n\n問題が生じたらその都度考えればヨシ、なはず……"}],["$","div",null,{"className":"flex mb-1","children":[["$","svg",null,{"stroke":"currentColor","fill":"currentColor","strokeWidth":"0","viewBox":"0 0 24 24","className":"text-subPrimary 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items-center py-4","children":[["$","div",null,{"className":"flex-1","children":[["$","div",null,{"className":"mb-1","children":"恋愛と勉強の両立"}],["$","div",null,{"className":"text-xs text-caption line-clamp-2 mb-1","children":"青春を謳歌している、素敵なご相談ですね。\n好きなんだけれど相手の邪魔はしたくない、でも想いを伝えたい、そんな葛藤が伝わってきます。\n\nさて、回答に移りますが\n私個人としては、告白はしてもいいのではないかと思います。理由は三点あります。\n\n第一に、すでにあなたは我慢が辛くなっているからです。受験を理由に恋愛を断つのであれば、次年度のあなたの受験期にも同じことを行うのが自然な理屈です。しかし今でさえ苦しいのに、もし恋人になれたとして、次年度のあなたの受験期に会うのを我慢し続けられるのでしょうか？おそらく無理でしょう。来年の自分が、会いたいのを我慢して、無理な精神状態で勉強を続けてもうまくいくと思わないのなら、告白するべきだと思います。\n\n第ニに、受験は本人の問題だからです。確かにあなたが告白をして、それが相手の心になんらかの影響を与えるかもしれません。しかし、それが理由で受験に落ちた、というのは言い訳に過ぎないのです。\n少し難しい話ですが、受験は試験の結果如何で合否が決まる、ただそれだけであり、その間の個人の状況は考慮されません。言い換えると、恋愛しようと事故に遭おうと当日朝に滑って骨を折ろうと、それは対等の条件なのです。あなたが告白をするのも、受験の上では対等な条件でしかないのですから、告白はしていいと思います。相手の迷惑を考えるのは、恋人になって受験の如何が自分事になってからでいいんです。\n\n第三に、恋愛が不利にはたらくわけではないからです。よく恋愛は受験における足枷という文言を耳にしますが、それは当人の制御が下手でうつつを抜かし、勉強をしなかったせいです。うまく使えば恋愛はすごい武器になると思います。\nわたし個人としては、会いたい気持ちを昇華させて勉強したり、受かって2人で喜ぶために勉強をしたりする方が、長く冗長な受験勉強にメリハリができ、モチベーションが上がるように思えます。週1のデートをモチベーションに勉強するとか、とてもいいですよね。\nもし付き合えた暁には、相手を律するのもパートナーの務めです。恋人関係になったからこそ、相手の結果が自分にとっても大事になりますから。そのために頻繁すぎる連絡は控えるとか、できることはありますよね。\n\n素敵なお悩みだと思います。\nどちらの選択をなさっても、人生における貴重な経験になるかと思います。\nぜひ後悔のない選択ができるようお祈りしています。"}],["$","div",null,{"className":"flex 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items-center py-4","children":[["$","div",null,{"className":"flex-1","children":[["$","div",null,{"className":"mb-1","children":"恋愛について"}],["$","div",null,{"className":"text-xs text-caption line-clamp-2 mb-1","children":"こんにちは。\n適度に恋愛するのはもちろん大丈夫だとは思いますが、受験のストレスの吐口を恋人以外に持った方がいいでしょう。\n\nあと、受験生カップルのどちらかが不合格になってしまった場合は本当に悲惨なので、絶対に現役で合格してください 。質問者さんは男なので尚更です。彼女だけが進学した場合150%大学で先輩にお持ち帰りされます。知り合いがそれでうつ病になってました。実話です\n\nまた、受験終わるまで告白はしない！みたいなチキり方をしてるといつのまにか好きな子に彼氏ができてた、みたいなことになるのでチキらないでなんかしらのタイミングで告白しましょう  フラれたらそのエネルギーを受験にぶつけてください\n\n旧帝志望ということで熱くなってしまいました。笑\n勉強頑張ってください"}],["$","div",null,{"className":"flex mb-1","children":[["$","svg",null,{"stroke":"currentColor","fill":"currentColor","strokeWidth":"0","viewBox":"0 0 24 24","className":"text-subPrimary mr-1","children":["$undefined",[["$","path","0",{"fill":"none","d":"M0 0h24v24H0V0z","children":[]}],["$","path","1",{"d":"M12 6c1.1 0 2 .9 2 2s-.9 2-2 2-2-.9-2-2 .9-2 2-2m0 10c2.7 0 5.8 1.29 6 2H6c.23-.72 3.31-2 6-2m0-12C9.79 4 8 5.79 8 8s1.79 4 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