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1a:T1015,ユザネさん、はじめまして
いつも勉強お疲れ様です。
一橋大学経済学部1年の麻婆豆腐という者です。
よろしくお願いします🤲

私自身、高校3年生のときに自己嫌悪やメンタルの崩壊
から鬱病の一歩手前まで行った経験があり、少しはお力になれるかと思いましたので回答させて頂きます。

まず私の経験からですが、高3の6月から9月頃までの間、あまりにもメンタルが崩壊しすぎてしまい、勉強が殆ど手につかず、心療内科に通ったりスクールカウンセラーの先生にお世話になったりしていました。学校を休みがちになったり、塾にも行かなくなった時期もありました。これから先の人生が真っ暗に見え、死にたくなるときも多々ありました。学校の授業を受けても頭に入って来ず、何をしても楽しくないと感じる日々でした。あまりに辛すぎて授業を抜けて保健室に駆け込むこともありました。

このような状況でしたが、色々な人の支えのお陰もあり、無事大学受験を乗り切ることが出来た経験を踏まえ、ささやかながら幾つかアドバイスさせて頂きます。

まず、自分自身をちゃんと受け入れてみて下さい。自分を嫌いになることは人間であれば誰しもが必ず日常的に経験することです。ですからそこに焦点を当てて責めてもキリがなく、そして何も生まれません。欠点も含めて自分はこういう人間なんだと常に受け入れて認めてあげられるとメンタルがかなり安定しやすいです。完全に受け入れられなくても受け入れる努力をするだけでも違います。あなたはあなたで良いのです。無理矢理他人と比較しても仕方がありません。人間色んな人がいて当然なんですから。

次に、一緒に励まし合いながら勉強出来る仲間を見つけてみて下さい。受験勉強において仲間の存在はとてつもなく大きいです。私がメンタルを壊したのも、3年生になって殆ど人と話さなくなったのが原因の一つなのではないかと今思うと感じます。辛い時にはお互いに励まし合って、そして頑張る時にはお互い切磋琢磨して共に勉強出来るような友人がいると、モチベーションも保たれるのでとても良いと思います。やはり一人孤独に勉強するのはあまりにしんどいですし、仲間がいると自分も頑張ろうという気になれるので是非良き友人を見つけて欲しいです。悩み事とかは人に話すだけでも大分軽くなりますしね。

後は、志望校に合格した自分を想像して見て下さい。自己嫌悪が激しく、自死を考えたこともある程だとのことですがもし自分が大学受験を乗り切って志望校に合格することが出来たら、自分に自信が持てて前よりは自分をもっと好きになれるのではないでしょうか？どんな結果であれ受験が終わった時に、自分本当によく頑張ったなと言えるように一年間是非頑張って頂きたいです。

最後に、ユザネさんは自己分析がちゃんと出来ている方だと思います。というのも、自分の欠点を認識した上でそれに対する解決策を探そうとしておられるからです。受験において自己分析能力はとても大切です。自分には何が出来ていて何が出来ていないのかを認識し、出来ていない所を改善して合格水準まで持っていくのが受験勉強の基本です。ですからユザネさんには是非とも自身の決断に自信を持って受験勉強に励んで欲しいと思います。
私で良ければ、どんな些細なことでも相談に乗りますから遠慮なく何でも聞いて下さいね☺️

長文失礼しました。1b:Tbfc,結論、付き合わない方がいいと思う！

でも、そのまま恋愛は続けて良いと思う。

どっちだよ笑って感じだけれど、要は今の感じのままにして付き合うのは合格後の方がいいと思うってこと。

この時期付き合うとね多分、不安感情増幅するだけだと思うんだよね。いらんことで心配したり、相手にされてないと悲しくなったり、成績低迷したとき八つ当たりしてしまったり。受験中も円満にやってるカップルは回答者の周りはいなかったな。

最初はうまくやるんだけれど、徐々に崩れていく感じ。

なので、最初の、お互い力合わせて頑張ろ！くらいのそこまで干渉しない、付き合う前の時期のほうが良いモチベーションを保てると思う。

ちなみに回答者は、高３では絶対に彼氏作らないと決めていたので作らなかったけれど(いや作れなかった?w)、良い恋愛はしてた😏

ちょっとそのときのことしゃべっていいですか。笑


塾のひとで、苗字順で席が前のひとだったんだけれど。最初はお互い全く関心がなかったが、ある日何気ない会話で、お互い好きなおでんの具が昆布ということで仲良くなった。
成績も同じくらいで、模試のあとは必ず成績を見せ合う仲に。彼にバカにされないように、差が開かないように、勉強も頑張れた。
家ではお互い勉強できない派だったので毎日塾の自習室通い&閉館まで一緒に勉強した。閉館のときは、自習室が真っ暗になるので2人で肝試し?をしたり。青春をした。
しかし受験が近づくにつれ、個別授業などが増え、会う機会が減っていった。
センター後、私大入試直前、久しぶりに彼と会った。すると彼は、次はいつ会えるかわからないから、、と、学ランのボタンを私にくれた(鼻血)。私はそのボタンを筆箱の中に入れ受験に挑んだ。強くなれた気がした...
回答者は結果合格。彼は国立志望だったのでまだ受験が残っていたが、お祝いしてくれた。初めて彼の自転車で2人乗りして町を回ったりした。だいぶうかれていた。
でも実は彼はセンターがあまりうまくいっていなかったようで。第一志望ではなく、地方の国立へ行くことが決まった。
回答者も進学の準備やら進学してからもドタバタ忙しく、彼に会えたのは結局それが最後であった、、、、、
彼とは結局友達以上恋人未満だったけれど、彼と頑張れたから合格できたのかも知れない。。なんて思っている。。。涙


、、、、何が言いたかったのか忘れたけれどとりあえず
・まだ付き合うな
・付き合う前の良好な関係が良好なモチベーションとなる

いかがでしょう。
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items-center py-4","children":[["$","div",null,{"className":"flex-1","children":[["$","div",null,{"className":"mb-1","children":"モチベーションの上げ方"}],["$","div",null,{"className":"text-xs text-caption line-clamp-2 mb-1","children":"慶應の経済学部の者です。\n\n失恋って辛いですよね。気持ちはよくわかります。でも頑張らなければならない時期は頑張らなくてはいけないもの。\nだから、失恋をバネに勉強の活力に変える方法をいくつかご紹介します。\n\n❶自分を失恋させた相手を見返してやろうと思うこと。\n\n僕は負けず嫌いなので、自分を振った相手や、自分を下に見ているような相手にはライバル意識を燃やして『絶対見返してやる！』と思って普段勉強していました。受験は競争なので、いかなる相手もだしぬくことが必要です。だから、こんなにも素晴らしい自分を振った相手を見返してる！という気持ちで勉強するのはいかがでしょか？\n\n❷ただただ勉強に没頭する。\n\n辛いことや悩みを時が解決してくれることは多々あります。今自分がすべきことは何なのか？をよく考えて、勉強に専念するというやり方です。\n『ランナーズ・ハイ』という言葉を知っていますか？\n人はある程度やり続けていると、段段ある動作が苦痛じゃなく楽しくなっていくということがあります。\nそれを勉強で再現するのです。\nただ勉強のことだけを考えて勉強するのもどうですか？\n\n❸幸せな大学生活を思い描く\n\n大学には色々な人との出会いがあります。今自分を振った相手なんかより、もっと魅力的な人が大学にはいるはずです。そんな人との出会いを楽しみにして、未来に目を向けて勉強するのも良いかもしれません。\n\n僕から紹介するのはこの３つの考え方です。\nどれか実践してもらえば嬉しいです！\n是非失恋に負けず、勉強頑張ってください！応援しています！"}],["$","div",null,{"className":"flex 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items-center py-4","children":[["$","div",null,{"className":"flex-1","children":[["$","div",null,{"className":"mb-1","children":"モヤモヤ"}],["$","div",null,{"className":"text-xs text-caption line-clamp-2 mb-1","children":"こんばんは！\nあー...その気持ち、非常によく分かります😅\n勉強に集中したいのに、しなきゃなのに、他のことに気を取られてしまう、、、。\nそういうことはきっと受験が終わってからもつきまといます。集中しなきゃいけない時ほどなぜか他のことが気になってしまう...!!\n僕自身、高3のときに彼女がいて、彼女も受験だったのですが色々とごたごたしてもめているときもありました...\nそういうときは得てして勉強に身が入らないものです...が、この時間の残り少ない時期には非常に良くないことです！！それを重々理解した上で、頭の切り替えを行ってみましょう。イメージとしては頭のスイッチをカチッと入れ替える感じで、その切り替えのルーティーンを意図的に自分で作ると良いです。簡単な例を挙げるなら、ゆっくり深呼吸して今は1秒を争うときである、と自分に言い聞かせる、などです。それでも気になることがある時は紙面にそれらをメモ程度に書き付け、勉強を終わらせてからまとめて心のわだかまりについて考えられるようにし、勉強の進行をなるだけ妨げないようにします。\nこれらをするうちに僕の場合はメンタルも自然と強くなっていき、試験のたびに緊張していた僕も受験のとき、全く動じることはありませんでした。\n是非一度試してみてください！\n追伸:受験を理由にあなたと別れたのに、今他の人と付き合っているような男のことを気にするのはあなたの時間がもったいないですよ！あなたの将来を第一に考えてみてください。他のことを考えていたせいで受験に失敗した...なんて勿体無い話だと思いませんか？僕の周りにそれで失敗した人がいましたが、やはり本人が一番後悔していました。悔いの残らないよう、頑張りましょう！！(｡•̀ᴗ-)✧"}],["$","div",null,{"className":"flex 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